If You Wanna Spend Time With Me

As I sit here typing this, in my pajamas, slippers, deep pore cleaning face mask, and mom bun, sipping my coffee, listening to my favorite radio station, I feel… peaceful.

This is one of my happy places. No one is talking to me, no one is asking anything of me. I can just BE. 

Don’t get me wrong, I have other happy places that invoke feelings other than peacefulness.

I love going to the gym (heck, I better love it if I’m gonna spend up to 12 hours a week there!). When I’m at the gym, I feel energized, motivated, accomplished. 

I love spending time with my children. They make me feel love, hope, purpose. 

I love spending time with my husband. He makes me feel desired, sexy, grounded. 

I love spending time with my friends. They make me feel adventurous, connected, young, wild and free.

But if I’m being honest, each of these happy places, which involve spending time doing things with others, also drain me. 

After a while, they invoke feelings of exhaustion, and if I’m not careful, I can become quite overwhelmed.

have to decompress…and I have to do it alone…and it’s best if I do it every day.

I used to think being introvert was a nice way to tell people that I’m just not that social, but I don’t think that’s true.

I am very social! I love people (albeit certain ones)! I just have to have time between seeing them to recharge my social batteries.

Funny thing is, all social interactions drain me, not just the ones with family and friends.

On a typical, non-eventful day I will wake up at 6am, get myself ready, wake up the kids, help the Littles get ready and eat breakfast, take 4 of them to school, come home for 30 minutes to start a load of laundry, empty the dishwasher, and see my husband off to work, hit the gym for 2 hours, come home for lunch at 11:30am, veg-out on the computer for an hour while Ty watches TV, do more laundry, wash dishes, sweep and mop the floors, vacuum, wipe down a few surfaces, start dinner, pick up the girls from the bus stop, have dinner with the kids at 4pm, clean up after dinner, help the Littles with their homework, do more laundry, get the Littles to clean up their play mess, help them take a bath, help them get ready for bed, and read a book to each of them before tucking them in, say goodnight to the Bigs, and settle down on the couch with my hubby and a drink from 8-10pm.

So, on a typical non-eventful day, I get one hour to decompress by myself in the middle of the day and two to unwind before bed. Some people might not need that, but I really, really do!

Now, add in my Tuesday night Zumba class, Wednesday grocery shopping and tumbling for Taylor, doctor’s/dentist’s appointments, things like pre-k and high school registration or fun family trips to the circus, and birthday parties on the weekends, and you can see why I end up spending an entire day vegging out from time to time!

It’s also the reason I struggle to keep my kids in extra-curriculars and am really choosy in how many play dates and Girls’ Nights I plan.

Regular life is pretty exhausting for someone like me.

But I love my life! I love my family and friends! I love going on adventures and trying new things!

I just can’t do it ALL THE TIME.

I need a break here and there.

Actually, I need a break pretty often.

So if you wanna spend time with me, invite me to something! Just don’t expect to see me too often. And don’t hold your breath waiting for ME to make a plan to spend time with you.

It’s not you.

The only thing I ever really make a plan to do outside of the things I have to do is decompress.

It’s not because I don’t want to see you.

I just need a break from EVERYTHING more.

Love, Your Friendly Introvert Who Really Is Social

Phoenix 2-001