All The Things I Didn’t Say On Father’s Day

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Yesterday was Father’s Day. It was the 14th Father’s Day I’ve celebrated with my husband, the best father I’ve ever known.

I never really had a father.

Obviously, there was a man who helped create me, but that man took his own life when I was 3 years old, leaving my mother all alone to raise two kids by herself.

I no longer hate him for that. I feel sorry for him and pray that he has found peace in a better place.

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Oddly enough, I still love him and miss him dearly, despite not really having any memory of him.

That just tells me how important fathers are.

We need them.

I often wonder how different my life would be if I had a father throughout my life.

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Fortunately, I now have an amazing father-in-law that I know I can count on for anything.

But I know it’s not the same.

Yesterday, we did what we always do when my husband has the day off.

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We spent the day together as a family.

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We were woken at 8:30am by Taylor, who “cook the eggs with lots of love for the best father in the world!”

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We didn’t have to be up for another hour, but at least we got to enjoy a nice breakfast, LOL!

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We went to the late service at church so I could hear my friend give the sermon while the pastor was on vacation.

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She did wonderfully, despite being a little nervous about sharing a personal testimony.

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Then we went to Waffle House, one of my husband’s favorite places to eat (and the restaurant we frequented the most when we first met).

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After lunch, we went to a local state park to meet up with my father-in-law to fish, swim, and grill out.

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I’m not a big outdoors-person, but I love going camping, fishing, and hiking with my family because it forces us to focus on each other.

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There’s just very few distractions in nature, except awesome ones that bring us together.

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Joe Daddy got busy hooking worms, while the rest of us enjoyed the scenery around us.

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I was particularly enamored by these super large ants on these yellow flowers.

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I also enjoyed watching the paddle-boarders and kayakers on the lake. Joe Daddy and I are really eager to get a chance to go off and do something like that ourselves!

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The Littles were picking and playing with every leaf in sight. I pray we don’t all end up with poison ivy.

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Taylor really liked playing with the worms. Yum.

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Jules just sat glued to his phone while he waited for a pole, when he totally could have been helping. Hey, I pick and choose my battles with this one. He’s a teenager. I force him to spend every Sunday with us, clean his room, feed the dog, and baby-sit his sisters, and because he does all of that without complaining, makes straight A’s in all advanced classes, and only wants to be on his phone or computer 24/7 because he likes to learn about writing code and programming for computers, draw comic book characters, and speak Japanese, I give him enough space to do as he pleases. We call him “Fuddy Bubbie” for a reason. He rarely wants to spend time with us, but I know it’s not because he doesn’t love us, it’s because he doesn’t enjoy the same things we do. Plus, he’s an introvert like his mama. He enjoys being alone. He still enjoys talking to us and hanging with his friends, so I don’t worry about him. He didn’t want to fish, but he did it anyway, because that’s what we were doing on Family Day. That’s all I ask.

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I love that my girls love to fish. I don’t really enjoy fishing myself, just because we don’t actually use the fish. As long as I buy my fish from the grocery store, I don’t see the necessity in fishing. I know how to fish and I do think it’s an important life skill to learn, which is why I support my girls fishing with their dad. I’m happy to get to sit back and soak up all of the beautiful scenery with my camera (phone)!

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The girls really wanted to go to the beach too, so we left Pa and Joe Daddy to fish by themselves for about an hour.

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The beach was crazy crowded, but they enjoyed their time there.

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Jules and Taylor actually hung out together on the buoy (gasp!), and The Littles hung out near the beach where they could touch (even though they kept their floaties on the entire time).

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I went swimming for a little while, but decided to stay in the shade on the beach so I could keep an eye on everyone.

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It wasn’t the ocean, but all the sand does make it feel beachy.

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When we went back to start making dinner, the kids switched up their fishing spots.

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The bridge proved to be the hot spot for success. Everyone caught several fish!

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Taylor caught 8!

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Ty caught 2!

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Trini caught 9! (Tristyn caught several fish too, but I never managed to get a pic of any of her catches).

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Pa and Joe Daddy  lost count, they caught so many!

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Once we got home and settled down for the night, Joe Daddy started going through the pictures I posted from our day.

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He got to this picture and said, “Everyone else on Facebook is writing essays on how great their fathers and husbands are and here you are: ‘I picked a good ‘un!'”

I immediately went to my defense on how many long winded posts I had made on behalf of my better half, but I was stopped short.

“No, I liked it. It was short and sweet and to the point. I like that.”

I smiled, inside and out. One of the things I love most about my husband is how simple and down-to-earth he is.

That’s probably why we work so well together. He’s the Yin to my Yang.

My short post was only out of necessity. We had a busy day and I just didn’t have time to write about how wonderful of a father he is.

“I picked a good ‘un!” sums it up, but oh, is there so much more.

So here’s all of the things I didn’t say on Father’s Day.

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I love how hard you work to provide for our family. I love that you don’t complain about having to work so hard. I love how proud you are of each and every one of us.

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I love that you don’t need fancy vacations, fancy meals at fancy restaurants, or a bunch of friends around to have a good time. I love that you just want to spend your time of with your family. I love our little adventures together. Especially the ones that don’t cost a thing. And I love that you love food just as much as me!

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I love that you don’t get caught up in how different you and Jules are. You accept him for who he is and look for the common ground between you. So many fathers want their sons to fit into a particular mold, but you love him despite the fact that he rarely wants to do the things you and your father enjoy doing together.

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I love that you treat our girls like capable human beings instead of helpless princesses. I love that you embrace their eagerness to do things like hunt, fish, and camp with you.

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I love your slowness to anger, your patience, your compassion. I’m glad our children have one good role model for those character traits! LOL!

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I love your energy, your playful attitude, and your sense of humor. Life can be exhausting and draining, but you never seem to lose those things.

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I love the way you love me. I love that you acknowledge my hard work, respect my boundaries, have compassion for my failures, and treat me as your equal. I love that you lift me up when I’m down and point me in the right direction when I’m lost. I love that you make me feel like I’m the most important person in your life. I never question if I’m cherished or wanted.

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I love your presence. When you are with us, which isn’t nearly as much as we would like, you are there, heart, mind, body, and soul. Our kids are so blessed to live a life unlike the one I lived. They get to have 2 parents who not only love them more than anything else, but love each other passionately and unconditionally. They are learning how to take care of themselves, live in this world with faith and integrity, and work together to overcome life’s obstacles.

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I love getting to walk through this crazy wonderful life with you.

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I love you. Every little piece of you. Heart, mind, body, soul. Forever.

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And I’m thankful for your father. I know how very important fathers are. I’m glad you got a good ‘un!

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Happy Father’s Day!

 

Phoenix 2-001